She has every right to feel violated, and didn't do anything wrong by nakedly studying while she was home alone. OP is TA, big time. When my friend in high school had to house sit, her parents pretty much expected people would be over. Anytime she house sat it'd be her, me, our two other friends and maybe 4 additional people usually it was just us or she'd have alone time with her boyfriend.
She always kept the house neat. We'd always help her wash dishes.
We'd always get someone of age to buy us booze not her parents stash. Her parents trusted her and she was a really good kid.
Got into a good college. Has a good job. You can say something like:. I have no reason not to trust you.
In short, your lack of interference in her personal space is a direct result of her actions. We want to raise a young adult who can make independent decisions and who can have a life of their own. Part of having a life of their own is having a space of their own. The word is just too overused in our culture. Instead of talking about rights, I prefer talking about responsibility, accountability, and obligations.
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One empty beer can is sufficient reason. If you find alcohol or drugs or pills, I think you have to start looking around, because your responsibility is to try to protect your child from himself. And in order to accomplish that, you need knowledge. Remember, knowledge is power.
The power you get when your eyes finally open and you see something clearly. Your responsibility is to be upfront and clear. If he hides it outside of the house, he hides it outside of the house.
The phone plan is probably in your name and you probably bought the electronic devices. In general, I think parents should be checking up on their child after a major infraction—and giving them effective consequences —as an obligation and a responsibility.
Turning things around is a tactic kids use to put parents on the defensive. They create an argument as a diversion to avoid taking responsibility for their actions or behavior. Below are a few tactics kids use in this situation and how parents should respond to ensure the discussion stays on track. Instead, the parent should calmly say something like this:. The problem is not spying. The problem is the rolling papers you have in your drawer. If you want to yell or scream, go yell or scream someplace else.
Go sit down, take a walk, go have a cup of tea. And then come back, talk about it, and explain the consequences for their actions. Tell your child:.
Many toys have a reset button that you can press to delete any information collected by the toy. Public Sex On Balcony Added 2 days ago. Back Get My Plan. Delete information regularly. If you spy on your child without cause and find something incriminating, I think you have to sit down and say:. People get fired from their jobs when they violate the rules and can no longer be trusted. Authorities have accused Huawei of violating US sanctions by doing business with Iran, a charge Meng has denied.
The issue is that your child had an empty beer can under his bed. Holding him accountable is not spying.
You know the rules in this house. There are no drugs and alcohol allowed, both in the house and for your own personal use. If you spy on your child without cause and find something incriminating, I think you have to sit down and say:.
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